Browns Live Blogging

Browns’ late game means morning chores for me. The dust bunnies under my computer work space were as large as wildebeests, but as meek as the St. Louis Rams.

Marv Albert again? Man, he pissed someone off to get stuck calling the Browns consistently.

Mark Adams thought about being stupid on the opening kickoff, but gets a 30 yard return. The Browns wasted no time executing what should be their biggest gain of the day.

Browns’ opening drive results in double digits negative yards. Maybe I should acid wash the tiles in my pool this afternoon.

Raiders timeout, probably because their weren’t prepared for how quickly they are moving through the Browns’ defense. The Southwest change fees commercials are about as annoying as the McDonalds’ commercials. The Commish should implement strict guidelines on commercials so every break isn’t like chewing tin foil. I am glad that J-Lo drives a toy car through the ghetto to stay sharp though. Her real car would be stripped at a stop light.

TD McFadden — at least I have him on my fantasy team.

McCoy ends the second offensive drive by throwing into a gaggle of players’ backs. I bet they practiced that over the bye week.

Fight in the Lions/49ers after the game. Bad weekend for Detroit. Take your loss like men, Lions. Wow — the Lions coach started the fight. Somewhere, the NFL charities are smiling.

TD Browns — acid washing the pool just was put on hold.

Raiders run back the kickoff the TD, which means we get to see the McCoy gunslinging show just that much quicker.

Browns’ illegal shift penalty puts some water on McCoy’s salt peter. Massaquoi trips over the Raiders’ emblem, which now seems to have inspired the Raiders’ pass rush.

Campbell breaks most of the bones in his chest. The Browns’ old friend Kyle Boller is in.

Hardesty drops another pass. McCoy tries to punish him by throwing the next pass at two Raiders’ defenders. Hard discipline like that is what once made this country great. Where is Hillis?

Shots! Just because it is too sunny and mild in Southern California this afternoon. This gentle breeze is cloying.

Christ, more Al Davis on TV tributes at halftime. He’s dead, people. This is time we could be using to watch the Indy Car crash again.

Harbaugh getting crucified at halftime. Fuck you, Old Boy Network. Harbaugh won. Don’t like getting your ass slapped? Win then.

Stil no Hillis. That must be one hell of a sore throat. Nice personal foul by the Browns after getting a first down so McCoy can pad his stats. Hardesty drops another pass. Bobby just reminded me that Hardesty has William Green’s number. No wonder.

Raiders FG. Time to end the Hardesty experiment and let Hillis play.

The Geico Caveman commericials have jumped the shark with this cheerleader outfit ad.

Hardesty fumble. Bench his ass.

The Browns have the fewest +20 yard plays this season. Bobby says remember to adjust for the bye week. Moneyball has influenced Bobby.

Fake FG results in Raiders TD. I should have acid washed the pool. Did the Browns not watch the Raiders’ game films from last week?

This just in: Colt McCoy is not an NFL QB. Free Seneca Wallace and sign Garrard.

Hillis comes in at the 12:40 mark as a decoy. It doesn’t work.

Dawson nails a 47 yd FG. Euclid and Parma go wild.

Report on the screen that Hillis had hamstring problems. I call bullshit. He is banging Shurmur’s wife.

I am not feeling any late 4th quarter heroics today. The good news is the game will be over soon, so we can watch real football.

The Browns have no ability to throw the ball down the field. None. Powell was right. To accent that, McCoy throws an INT. Play under review though — more false hope.

No sense of urgency with the clock ticking. Doesn’t McCoy realize that hopes and dreams are on the line?

TB Browns. More false hope. Onside kick recovered. Still more false hope. Failure to convert on fourth down ends that.

Poor poor Cowboys. Shots to the fallen!

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