Dear Sean Peterson [Director of Ticket Operations and Sales; Inland Empire 66ers]:
Happy National Bobblehead Day! Cynics might think this is just another one of those fake holidays on the middle of winter, designed to sell mini pack plans, but you and I know better. This is the first precursor to spring training, meaning while we are still in the throes of winter, today is the first step to the Cactus League. Of course, GM Joe is still going to expect you to sell truckloads of ticket plans today, so their is probably no easing back into your work week after your honeymoon. Did you get to any winter league action in Puerto Rico?
Things sure have been slow this past month with you gone, although Hunter Horenstein [Director of Fan Engagement; Myrtle Beach Pelicans] barked at me for calling him a Nazi. I think we are pretty tight now, but you never know with those Carolina League guys. I think his organization is still smarting from losing a Golden Bobblehead to something called the Udder Tuggers. I know if that happened to me, I would probably join the French Foreign Legion or something. Hunter is an Angels’ fan from Long Beach. I see the 66ers are not hiring at this time, so I guess Hunter is staying in Myrtle Beach for now.
Speaking of changing professions, did you hear Taylor McCarthy [General Manager, Stockton Ports] left the profession to take an athlete director’s position with the University of New
Hampshire? He and I were planning the 2020 Cal League All Star Game tailgate parties and working on the design of the official All Star game polos, so his departure was rather jarring, It is is a crazy business, this minor league baseball with people coming and going all the time. But not you though, which is why we call you ”Rock”. He did mention to me how much he enjoyed drinking shots with you at the California League meetings, but he now has to worry about things like the women’s lacrosse budget making sure the janitors make the gym floor sparkle.
He is free of the Stockton homeless camps though. I wonder whatever became of George Bateman. I am sure one day we will all meet again,
I am sure you have heard the 66ers have a new manager named Jack, which should make Anna Forslin [Promotions Manager; Inland Empire 66ers]’s much easier. I am sure is working hard on securing a corporate sponsorship with Jack in the Box restaurants so I have not sent her my swell ideas year, but I will share my t-shirt ideas with you: “That’s a fact, Jack!” with Skipper Santora’s image on the front, and “You Don’t Know Jack!” with Bernie’s image. Yes, I can hear those cash registers ringing too.
Perhaps you could drum of some season ticket sales with promotions like “Shots with Jack!” in which season ticket holders get to stay after certain games to drink tequila with the manager. You better tell Ryan Liptrot [Director if Food and Beverage] to start stock up, as there can be no Code Reds with this promotion. Does Jack know what he is getting into though with San Bernardino? This ain’t Westwood or Monterey. The G Street Hobos are going to see him as FRESH MEAT. Maybe you and I should drive him around town and show him the ropes. We can take GM Joe for muscle, The 66ers have not had a charismatic manager since Denny Hocking ran for President in 2016; we do not want the means streets of Berdoo claiming him before his time.
Anyway, I have an early afternoon tee time. I know you will be slaving away at the office though, but I promise to woo the country club crowd with the tantalizing idea of bobblehead mini packs. I am going to tell them that improvements are in store for The Garage in terms of shade and drink selection because I am sure you guys are on that already.
Your friend in baseball,