Dear Austin [Vice President, Sales and Marketing; Fayetteville Woodpeckers]:
Thank you for your quick response. You would be surprised how many minor league executives do not bother to respond to me, but not you. You are obviously a man of the people. Since I worship at the Church of Baseball, this time of year is a giant pagan celebration for me, but since I also believe in over the top commercialism, HO! HO! HO! Now I have a machine gun! Sorry, that is a line from the great Christmas move Die Hard. I don’t really have a machine gun, although once upon a time, the US Army trained me on the M-60. Not at Fort Bragg though. I wasn’t infantry.
Anyway, Harold did not give me what my family and friends refer to as the Peckerwood hat. Harold lives in San Diego. He is often my companion on my baseball pilgrimages. The Cactus League, Cooperstown, the AFL — these are yearly visits for us. In a couple of days we are going to Mexicali for some Liga Mexicana del Pacifico action (I am going to wear the Peckerwood hat — your logo is crossing international borders). Loosely translated, that means Mexican Winter Ball. My buddy Nick is the guy who sent me the hat. He popped his cherry at the AFL this past November. When we put him back on the the plane, there wasn’t a dry eye in the SUV. It was quite the trip.
Thank you for the Peckerwood (oops, I mean Woodpecker) attachment, although it is more like a manifesto. It is solid though. Very well done. Your dedication to the local community is impressive. I also love the home jerseys. I do not have time to discuss rebranding today because my family is expecting me to take them to Disneyland. Perhaps as I am standing in line for Space Mountain, I can start working on an outline for THE REBRAND.
Oh, one other thing. It is the Inland Empire 66ers, not the Empire 66ers. A mistake like can get you stabbed in San Bernardino. It is a rough, territorial town. Those love live there affectionately call it The Dino. I don’t live there though because crime is not my scene.
Anyway, I need to go see a man about a mouse(Disneyland reference).
Your friend in baseball.
PS: You can just call call me Bads. The *85″ seems so formal.