Playoff Predictions

Who I want to do well in the baseball post season, and who I think will do well are two different entities. For instance, I want the Tampa Rays to win the World Series, but I don’t think they will get past the Texas Rangers, even though they are up 6-0 as I am writing this. I want the New York Yankees to sweep the Detroit Tigers in such a lopsided affair that Pizza Pizza Boy spends foolishly in the offseason in a vain attempt to chase the past. After all, any team financed by the pizza that welfare people shun is predicated on nothing good. Little Caesar’s is the middle class opiate — for five bucks, you can pick up something hot and bland that will fool your kids into thinking they are actually eating pizza. Fuck Little Caeser’s and fuck the Detroit Tigers. However, I think they will beat the Yankees because Joe Girardi is a rockhead who, instead of managing his team, will be too busy complaining about a perceived miscarriage of justice that robbed NYC of its dignity. Think Davey Johnson in the 1997 ALCS, but with an NYC angle.

I want the Arizona Diamondbacks to go to the World Series because then the Arizona Fall League would be rocking. However, I think that the Milwaukee Brewers will hurt them very bad. I want the Phillies to crush Tony LaRussa’s spleen, and that will probably happen. I would want the Brewers to beat the Phillies, but that starting rotation will send Prince Fielder packing. In the ALCS, I would want the Rangers to hurt the Tigers, and they will.

In a Texas/Phillies World Series, I would want the Rangers to win, but that won’t happen. The Rangers will be humiliated, and the Hot Stove League will start early this year.

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